China kung fu monks seek apology for ninja affront!!

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China kung fu monks seek apology for ninja affront!!

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BEIJING (Reuters) - China's Shaolin Temple, the cradle of Chinese kung fu, is demanding an apology from an Internet user who said its monks had once been beaten in unarmed combat by a Japanese ninja, Chinese media reported on Friday.

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Shaolin Temple, in the northern province of Henan, became famous in the West as the training ground for Kwai Chang "Grasshopper" Caine in the 1970s "Kung Fu" TV series.

Ninjas -- professional assassins trained in martial arts -- date back to mediaeval Japan.

"The so-called defeat is purely fabricated, and we demand the Internet user to apologise to the whole nation for the wrongs he or she did," the Beijing News said, citing a notice announced by a lawyer for the Shaolin monks.

Relations between Chinese and Japanese are sensitive at the best of times, with emotions still running high over Japan's invasion and occupation of parts of China in the first half of the 20th Century.

The Internet user, calling themselves "Five Minutes Every Day", said on an online forum last week that a Japanese ninja came to Shaolin, asked for a fight and many monks failed to beat him, the newspaper said.

"The facts that the monks could not defeat a Japanese ninja showed that they were named as kung fu masters in vain," the Internet user was quoted as saying in the post.

The Shaolin temple "strongly condemned the horrible deeds" of the user, the newspaper said.

"It is not only extremely irresponsible behaviour with respect to the Shaolin temple and its monks, but also to the whole martial art and Chinese nation," it quoted the monks as saying.

Reknowned Shaolin Monks Liu Kang and Kung Lao could not be reached for comment. A severely scarred ninja commented by sign language, under the condition of anonymity, "Dude, those fucking Shaolin pussies. I can't believe they're taking this so seriously. My girlfriend could, unarmed, kick all their combined asses and still be back home in time to fix supper for me and my pet wolf! They need to get over this, and get back to ironing their panties."
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Re: China kung fu monks seek apology for ninja affront!!

Post by Stormshadow »

I remember once kicking the asses of an entire country of Shaolin Monks. I believe it was called China. It took me the better part of an afternoon, but that was only due to sheer numbers, and not because of any skill on their part. I think i even fell asleep in the middle of it for about half an hour and still managed to kick about 10,000 Shaolin Monk asses. I bet even Orbsah Stealth Ninja could kick himself a Shaolin Monk ass or two. And he's the most pathetic wannabe excuse for a ninja I've even encountered. Shaolin Monks are the martial arts equivalent of cotton candy. It looks like a lot, but really it's not.
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Re: China kung fu monks seek apology for ninja affront!!

Post by Seamus ODoyle »

Oi remember one o' them Monk fellers comin' in te the pub and askin' fer directions. Sean O'Doogan thought that little rice picker said summat 'bout his mum and smashed a Guiness bottle o'er his head. He went down like a bag o' hammers. Then 'bout a hundred of the little jumpin' beans came in te' settle the score. Even three sheets t'the wind, me and the lads mopped the floor wit'em in 'bout seven minutes. Prancin' nancys cannae fight te save their lives!! Jesus, Mary'n'Joseph Oi'd be embarrased to call meself a Shalin Monk, that strewth!!
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