the vynsane asylum

i HAVE SHARK DREAMS (OR NIGHTMARES) EVERY SO OFTEN. sINCE i USED TO BE TOTALLY INTO BESTIALITY BEFORE i BECAME A WORLD-RENOWNED FATHERFUCKER, i ALSO THOUGHT THAT THIS WAS HOW i WAS MEANT TO DIE. tHAT MADE SENSE TO ME. bEING AN OLD MAN IN DYING OF A HEART ATTACK WHILE BALLS-DEEP IN SOME CRUSTY OLD CODGER'S ARSE IS NOT MY IDEA OF A GOOD DEATH (EVEN IF i DO PASS WHILE HE'S ASLEEP).

a CERTAIN WAY YOU CAN DIE BY SHARK ATTACK WHILE FUCKING THAT LITTLE FISHY SEEMS MUCH FASTER - AND A LOT SEXIER SOMEHOW.

ok, SO IN MY DREAM, i'D ALREADY CHOSEN TO "CHECK OUT" SOME OF THE FISHY ASSHOLES IN THE OCEAN.

i WAS ON AN AIR MATTRESS FLOATING AMONGST GREAT WHITES OFF THE gALAPAGOS iSLAND. (i WATCHED A dISCOVERY cHANNEL SHOW ABOUT SHARK SEX BASED THERE SEVERAL YEARS AGO, BUT NEVER FORGOT IT).

i HAD A MESSAGE IN A BOTTLE ON ME (WELL, IT WAS MORE LIKE A MULTI-PAGE MANUSCRIPT OF MY FAVORITE SONG ("iT'S rAINING mEN") AND THESIS ABOUT THE JOYS OF ASS-SLAMMING vYNSANE). tHE BOTTLE WAS SUPPOSED TO WASH ASHORE AND BE FOUND BY tHE gRIN NEXT TUESDAY, SO HE COULD GET A LAUGH OUT OF IT.

aNYWAY, THE SHARKS WERE HUGE. pROBABLY 12-14 INCHES. bUT THEY WERE PRETTY MUCH IGNORING ME AS i FLOATED ON MY RAFT / AIR MATTRESS THING (YOU KNOW: ONE OF THOSE SWIMMING POOL TOYS THAT sENOR jABBAjOHNl'S DAD JUST LOVES TO DO ALL SORTS OF KINKY SHIT ON). i HAD TO FIND A WAY TO GET ONE OF THOSE SHARK DONGS INSIDE ME!

hAVING NOTHING LEFT TO DO, AND NOT BEING A PERSON THAT LIKES TO DWELL ON THINGS, i DIVED OFF THE AIR MATTRESS ONTO A GREAT WHITE SHARK THAT SWAM NEXT TO IT. aND MY BIG, BLACK DICK WENT RIGHT INTO ITS SHARKY ASS!

tHE FISH WAS STARTLED FOR A SECOND. hE SHOOK VIOLENTLY, AND SAID, "dUDE, WHY ARE YOU FUCKING ME? i'M NOT A GAY SHARK!" BUT i GRABBED THE DORSAL FIN AND HUNG ON, AND KEPT THRUSTING AND POUNDING. i WORRIED I'D GET IN TOO DEEP AND i REALLY DON'T RELISH THE THOUGHT OF DROWNING BECAUSE MY DICK IS STUCK IN A SHARK'S ASS.

tHE OTHER SHARKS KEPT THEIR DISTANCE, AS THIS WHOLE EVENT WAS PROBABLY VERY STRANGE TO THEM. fOR ALL i KNOW, THERE'S NO "bIZARRO tHE sHARK gRIN." i LOST MY HOLD AND MADE FOR THE SURFACE AS i NEEDED AIR.

tHE SAME SHARK i'D GRABBED WAS AROUSED TO SAY THE LEAST. hE TURNED AND HEADED STRAIGHT FOR ME. i TOOK IN MY LAST LUNGFULL OF AIR AND THEN TURNED TOWARD HIM ACCORDING TO MY PLAN, SO i FACED HIS JOHNSON WITH MY ASS FIRST.

a THRUST OF HIS POWERFUL FINS AND i WAS PENETRATED, HIS COCK IN MY ASS. oBVIOUSLY i LOST TRACK OF WHAT HAPPENED TO THE OTHER SHARKS AFTER THAT, BUT i REALLY DIDN'T CARE. i SUPPOSE THE OTHER SHARKS COULD HAVE FUCKED ME, TOO. bUT AS LONG AS ONE GIANT FISH DONG WAS IN ME, i WAS COOL. bY THE WAY, i WAS ALMOST NAKED, BUT i FELT A LITTLE MODEST SO i WAS WEARING CROTCHLESS PANTIES ONLY. i'D ORIGINALLY PLANNED TO DO THIS NAKED, BUT, WHY PASS UP AN OPPORTUNITY FOR A FUNNY PHOTO?

aNYWAY, THE SHARK CAN SUPPOSEDLY BANG FOR 20 MINUTES OR LONGER. sO HE HAD NOT CUM YET. i'D LOST CONSCIOUSNESS FROM THE SHEER ECSTASY, BUT i'D CUM MYSELF FAIRLY QUICKLY.

i REGISTERED SOME SORT OF CRAMPING DISCOMFORT IN MY BODY, AND FIGURED THE SHARK HAD FINALLY CLIMAXED AND BLOWN ITS LOAD. iT TOTALLY STUNK LIKE A ROTTING GOLDFISH, WHICH WAS REALLY FUCKING KINKY.

tHIS DESCRIPTION MAKES 20 MINUTES SEEM LIKE A MATTER OF SECONDS i KNOW, BUT REALLY, THIS IS ALL HAPPENING AND IT FEELS LIKE ETERNITY.

iN ANY CASE, i GUESS THE SHARK KNEW HE COULDN'T DO THAT AGAIN SO SOON, SO HE PULLED OUT. hE GAVE ME HIS NUMBER AND i PROMISED TO CALL, BUT WE BOTH KNEW i WOULDN'T. tHERE ARE TOO MANY OTHER FISH IN THE SEA.

tHIS THREAD WAS VERY HARD FOR ME TO POST ACTUALLY. i SPLOOGE IN MY PANTS EVERY TIME i THINK OF IT. i MIGHT CALL THAT SHARK, AFTER ALL. hE WAS GOOD. dAMNED GOOD. cAPTAINsOLO1138 AFTER SEVEN BEERS GOOD, YOU KNOW?

tHIS IS BUT A VERY SHORT ANECDOTE. i'M THE PROTAGONIST OF THE STORY, AND i GET SOME SERIOUS FISH LOVIN' RATHER QUICKLY IN THE TALE'S TIMEFRAME. nOW i'M WRITING A MAJOR NOVEL BASED ON ALL THE DIFFERENT FISH i'VE MADE LOVE TO SINCE. tHAT'S WHAT i'M USUALLY AT MY COMPUTER WORKING ON. (wELL, EITHER THAT, OR DOWNLOADING GAY PORN.) iT'S SOME 3,000,000+ PAGES ALREADY. aS i NOTED, THIS SHARK TALE IS INCREDIBLY EROTIC, SO IT'S THE GYST OF THE STORY. (fOR MORE INFO, HOP OVER TO THE "lITERATURE" FORUM AND READ MY THREAD, "i'M wRITING a BOOK!")

hOPEFULLY WHEN IT'S DONE, i'LL HAVE MORE TIME TO DEVOTE TO ALL THAT DEVIANT SHIT THAT ukwILDcAT'S POP IS INTO.

Wow.

This may be the single most disgusting thing I've read on this site, and that's saying a lot.

I have no idea what idiot is suffering from the case of MFPD responsible for Bizarro The Grin, but this goes way beyond the silly humor of a guy who goes around having gay sex with every father on earth. This is just sick. I'm debating whether to tell Tycho about this thread and let him rip you a new asshole, you sick fucking twat.

Well, I have to agree with Anarky, you're a sick twisted demented fuck.

That's just nasty. How can anyone post something like that?

Yeah man, whoever is behind BTG is pretty fucked up- tho if they start posting threads (topics) about every fuckin film they ever saw, I think we might have enough clues to name the perpetrator... man, I thought the legend of shark-boy in "cabin boy" was crude, but this is something ELSE

Wonder if the MTS can step in and do an IP search or somethin??

mabudon wrote:Wonder if the MTS can step in and do an IP search or somethin??

Ah, mabudon, we have, of course, tried this technique using the Bat-IP Scanner. But our efforts have been... to no avail. It seems this dastardly arch-fiend uses a different computer each time... no doubt after his trysts with various sodomites.

However, this disgusting mockery of a post has given us the clue we need to prove that this vile villain is truly none other than... The Joker. Yes, for years, The Joker has had an unexplained... fascination with sharks. Coupled with what we already know, that Bizarro The Grin matches The Joker's description, we can reasonably assume that this is an alias of the nefarious Clown Prince of Crime himself.

We shall have no problem capturing Bizarro The Grin now. For there is one thing that The Joker cannot resist, and that is the Gotham National Bank. Yes, the Bank, and especially the gold repository therein. And with the entire Gotham Police Department on leave for the holidays, there's no one left to guard the million dollars or so worth of gold ingots that were delivered just this morning. Millions of dollars worth of pure gold, just there for the taking should any villainous thief choose to strike at this inopportune hour.

(Robin, contact Gordon immediately and send a full force to the Gotham National Bank. And tell them to have their... billy clubs ready. The Joker cannot resist this setup.)

I must offer the... friendly reminder to any users of vynsane.com who reside in West Virginia or Arkansas that merely reading the title of a thread so... needlessly vulgar constitutes a felony in your state, and Robin and I will have to make a citizen's arrest and you will be... prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.

Hate to break this to ya, Bats, but you should mosey on over to the announcements forum and see what the latest is from Newsbot, sounds like you're gonna be a busy man this holiday period

Fucked by a shark? I honestly believe I've seen (or heard, or read - whatever) it all at this point. Pretty incredible level of gayness you got there, BTG.

jjreason wrote:Pretty incredible level of gayness you got there, BTG.

yeah, almost to the point where he's the only "true-gay" on the face of the planet... and all others are just "false-gay's" trying to be as gay as BTG...

hmmmmmm.... it makes one wonder...

I thought time would have made this less disgusting.

It did not.

Grimlock, since you're back, you sick fuck, can you banish this turd? Not necessary to banish the entire Group, since the others are funny, except for Devastator. And with The Bizarro Grin gone, they can't form Devastator, anyway. So it's totally win-win.

Good points Anarky. I say just ban Snigtad

Ban Snigtad or feed him to a shark? Or possibly Sharkicon, should Grimlock remember where they live.