the vynsane asylum

Grimlock · Post by **Grimlock** » Fri Mar 10, 2006 3:09 pm

Me Grimlock make poopie today, look just like CaptainSolo1138. That not hard, though, since CaptainSolo1138 already look like shit.

Antropov · Post by **Antropov** » Fri Mar 10, 2006 3:14 pm

Me CaptainSolo1138. Me like to listen to Yanni while me CaptainSolo1138 give Carrot Top handjob.

Antropov · Post by **Antropov** » Fri Mar 10, 2006 3:48 pm

Damn, dude. That's low.

Fuckin' passive aggressive piece of shit.

Eternal Padawan · Post by **Eternal Padawan** » Mon Mar 13, 2006 12:32 am

My three year old is getting potty trained and he was sitting on the toilet and he points down between his legs and excitedly goes "Hot Dog!" At first I thought he was referring to his member and I was thinking who the hell taught him that? so I asked him to clarify. And he pointed at the perfect hot dog shaped shit he had just dropped into the bowl. In spite of myself encouraging that kind of behavior from him, I busted out laughing for a solid minute.

captain funtime · Post by **captain funtime** » Mon Mar 13, 2006 1:21 pm

I once took a dump on Bertha and she ate it like the pig fucker she is.

Diabolical · Post by **Diabolical** » Wed Mar 15, 2006 2:49 pm

I had a weird shit this morning.
Started like a slightly mushy Snickers and ended like a Snack Pack.
It didn't want to end. Just when I though I was through, I felt more a brewin'.
Took nearly an hour before all was said and done. My legs fell asleep and I read 2 comics and a magazine.

It was like Christmas.

Dell Rusk · Post by **Dell Rusk** » Mon Mar 20, 2006 12:10 am

hey i have 109 posts now!

Dell Rusk · Post by **Dell Rusk** » Mon Mar 20, 2006 12:10 am

now it says i have 110!!

Dell Rusk · Post by **Dell Rusk** » Mon Mar 20, 2006 12:11 am

and now it's 111! i guess it will always be one off. lol

Eternal Padawan · Post by **Eternal Padawan** » Mon Mar 20, 2006 5:03 am

So I crapped out a 15 incher this morning. It curled itself into a circle in the bottom of the bowl. i was very impressed with myself. But then I spent about 15 minutes wiping because it left a serious case of mud butt. A trade off I suppose.

Slicker · Post by **Slicker** » Mon Mar 20, 2006 6:53 am

I love them ones where it's so big that it takes the entire force of the flush to break it in half like the Titanic. But it's a pain in the ass cleaning the bowl after that. Just never enough water pressure to get all the streaks.

Slimmie · Post by **Slimmie** » Mon Mar 20, 2006 7:57 am

I just let the streaks soak until the next time I have to piss. Then just blast them off with the pee power wash treatment. You will never touch a toilet brush again, and it makes taking a leak a little more fun.

kidhuman · Post by **kidhuman** » Mon Mar 20, 2006 8:25 am

Slimmie, that just might be the one thing we have in common, blasting the rim residue of the back of the toilet with a pressure washing urine blast.

Slimmie · Post by **Slimmie** » Mon Mar 20, 2006 9:07 am

And the first 2 digits of our post counts.

Fuck. Nevermind.

Antropov · Post by **Antropov** » Mon Mar 20, 2006 2:57 pm

I like to shit. I like the toilet at my mom's house (it sit's kinda close to the ground). I hate to shit on the toilet at my mom's house.

No matter what I plug the goddamn thing up. Yesterday I dropped a fucking bomb in that bitch and, thinking I had learned my lesson before, gave a "courtesy flush". That fuckin toilet stopped quicker than Rogue II at a "but 1 enema get 1 free" sale. And for reasons known only to God, my mom keeps the plunger behind the fucking washing machine. Not only is it not in the bathroom, but I have to walk through the kitchen and down a couple stairs into the laundry room to get it.

Regardless of how funny I walked, I knew there was no avoiding the spread of shit up and down my ass crack (its like putting fire sauce on a taco and expecting it to stay in one spot, even though you're squeezin' it). Thank god I had yet to take a shower.

BM