the vynsane asylum

Wow Snigtad, that is quite a find. You got really lucky. I wish I was you and had your luck.

STAR WARS IS DOOMED!!!

Since not everyone from here frequents SSG, I thought I would copy and paste my review of this figure for their benefit.


Bib Fortuna, Jabba the Hutt's majordomo, is one of the more recognizable secondary characters from Return of the Jedi, and hasn't had a new figure since 1997, although there was a repaint of the figure released in '04. This new Bib Fortuna is the 3rd figure in the new line, but a higher price, miserable articulation, and poor choice of facial expression scuttle this one.

Packaging: 3.5/5
The front design uses an OTC-style look with more angles and a curved bubble, as well as a scene photo background and character photo bubble insert, this looks alright but I still prefer the actual OTC packaging which was more straightforward - this new curved bubble minimizes the impact of the contents, and feels a bit thin. The scene photo is the same one as the OTC Bib's card which is a bit funny. The figure is inside holding his knife out to his right. The cardback is a mess, with elements coming and going without using their space very well or seeming totally crowded, then there's a little window in the bottom right with the random-packed packin hologram figure, it's fairly secure in there tho'. Opening the packaging requires ripping or cutting, there's small taped flaps, welding, and inverted welding at the bottom.

Sculpt-Design: 3/5
The POTF2 figure had a split-robe design which made him look fat, and a face to match. This new Bib doesn't have fat-robe issues because he's essentially a salt-shaker, his body *is* the robe, this makes his legs (which he does have) unusable and he has no actual shoulders. The sculpting on the body is pretty good, looks like a real costume, with a separate piece for the front of the sash. The hand poses have character without looking crazy. The figure's face is awful, his mouth is open and sucking in the chin while his eyes remain normal, giving the look of a yawning Bib Fortuna... or Butt-head sans Beavis. The face still looks a little fat due to pronounced cheeks, fat neck, and oversized wattle. From the side and back, the ball-joint neck design stands out as it often does. The head tails look good but aren't flexible enough, this is where the rubbery plastic would have been welcome.

The body looks good, but is nearly useless. The face has a terrible expression and still isn't quite right, but looks better than the previous version. All in all, if you want a goofy-faced statue, then the rating would be a 5 out of 5, but it's supposed to be an action figure.

Articulation: 1.5/5
Pitiful. Bib has a ball-jointed neck, but it's somewhat limited by the head tails, there's also a standard neck joint under that which doesn't add anything. There isn't any shoulder articulation since there aren't shoulders, which is charming, and the legs aren't articulated either. That leaves mid-bicep swivel, diagonal-cut-joint elbows, and rotating wrists. The wrists are useful, the left elbow lets that arm straighten, the mid-bicept swivels can move only about 15 degrees, and basically the whole thing works poorly.

Paint-Deco: 3.5/5
The body has pretty good paint and colors, it looks realistic thanks to subtle metallic weathering on the chest plate and bracelets. The paint on the fingers is also good, pink with gray nails, there's a little slop but it's acceptable. The head is a totally different tale though, the eyes and mouth have ok detailing , but the head's cast in pink plastic but given light blue accenting and a thick matte finish when it should be shiny. The head tails are separate pieces which are far more blued so they don't match at all. Too many little mismatches and issues really end up hurting the overall score.

Accessories: 2/5
Bib Fortuna gets just 1 actual accessory, a small silver dagger with a gold handle, there's not much detail because it's so tiny, but it does fit in either hand and can be slipped into Bib's sash. Then there's the ROTJ stand with the figure's name painted on the front, it's half as tall as the OTC stands and doesn't interlock, and I may be wrong about this but it feels more breakable than the OTC one. Finally, there's the price-increase-compensator, the random-packed hologram figure -- I got Boba Fett for my first one, the sculpting is decent and the blue translucent plastic is a good color, but there's too much sparkly stuff inside, and I really wouldn't have bought this on its own.

Overall: D+/C-
If this had been $5, I probably would have been *slightly* more generous, but the reality is that this isn't a great figure, it's a marginal improvement in looks over the '97 figure, it's a poorly articulated salt-shaker, and worst of all it has a goofy face, so at $7 it's totally not worth it.

Since swearing seems to be a norm here, let me sum it up in a few sentences.

This figure is a piece of shit and not worth the fucking 7 dollars + tax I spent on it. If they didnt add a leap second to the clock this year, I would demand my time back that was spent in the check-out line. If Hasbro keeps this shit up, the line will die very quickly.

You could have just put the last paragraph up so we didnt have to see it a second time JT.

While that is true, that last paragraph came to my mind immediately after opening Bib. For obvious reasons, I can't post it anywhere but here. However, it would make no sense to include it without the rest of the review. In other words, blow me, KH. [;)]

I've given up on SW. Except clones. Clones kick ass! I think I have over thirty of them now. SA Clones are like crack. Every time I see one on the peg, without reason I have to buy it and rip it open and put it with all the others.

Blow me? I didnt think you could talk like that.

Considering we are not on "THE OTHER SITE" I can talk anyway I want, so fuck off. [thumb][;)]

I tHoUgHt I fOuNd ThE sArLaC pIt pLaYsEt, BuT iT wAs JuSt YoUr MoThEr'S cOoChIe. It LoOkS aS iF sLiMeR fRoM GhOsTbUsTeRs BeAt Me To It.

Slimer? Now that's a name I haven't heard in a long time. A long time.

No kidding. The sight of Slimer - complete with a mouthful of big hotdogs - paints a hilarious, though thoroughly disturbing image of Snigtad's mom's virginia. So much so, it makes me wonder if Rick Moranis and Bill Murray banged Snig's mom before they made Ghostbusters - and her pussy is what gave them the inspiration to make the movie.

Jesus, Snig - you could be Rick Moranis' long lost love child. Moranis IS awfully close to Moron when you look at the spelling....

Got a favor to ask of Anarky here...I have spoken to JJ and Pegger, both have asked if I can grab them the upcoming Target exclusive of the Senate pack w/pod. I dont have a problem doing so, but with the amount I need and for them, I was thinking I might not have enough cash if and when i see them. So old friend Anarky, since you and JJ have traded/dealt/swapped spit and butt fucked each other in the past, would you mind helping that fellow collector out?

My best shall I do, though promise anything this early I cannot. Target exclusives sometimes easy to come by they are, and sometimes even Chux find them cannot.

Wait, Yoda I am not. Or am I?

Thank you kind sir. And Yoda you are not.

I have had great luck in finding the Target exclusives. I have an entire army of the Lava Anakin and Obi-Wan exclusives. They are the best investment Mrs. Chuxter and I ever made.