So, What comics did you buy this week?

[Rollo Tomassi]

They didn't explain the biggest elephant-in-the-room in DC history?

Fuuuuuuuuuck.

As I explained in the other topic, they haven't thought that far ahead and are desperately hoping nobody figures it out. And I'm quite sure Gail Simone, being a decent writer, probably came up with a solution, but was probably told to toss it/hold off until they could get the other 51 ducks in a row. Which will happen around April of next year. The most obvious solution is a Lazarus Pit.

The nude Joker is a bit of a head scratcher though. That just seems random for random's sake.

[anarky]

So, here's another head-scratcher:

The Joker has been Joker for six years. In the first three years (since it's been three years since he shot Babs), he got enough of a hate-on for Gordon to go and shoot his daughter. Yet he apparently was wearing clothes then, and the nude thing is a more recent development.

If they're keeping Year One (which it seems like they're doing), then Batman has been Batman for almost exactly a year longer than the Joker has been the Joker. In other words, seven years. For two years, no one knew he existed, apparently, judging from the whole "operating in secret prior to five years ago" thing from JLA. So, if Barbara Gordon was dressing up as Batgirl for a party (again, assuming they kept her origin the same), it would have to have been within the year immediately prior to her being shot, or she wouldn't have known what the fuck she was dressing as. Every adventure she had occurred in just less than a year.

The Killing Joke was published in 1988, and was, apparently, set in continuity at the time of publication, since Babs was in a wheelchair almost immediately afterwards. Jason Todd was killed (real time) in late 1988. So the Joker put a bullet in Babs Gordon pretty shortly before he bashed Jason's brains in and blew him to smithereens. This puts Dick's entire career as Robin, as well as a decent-sized chunk of his Nightwing adventures, within the first two years (at most) of Batman's career. Forget that it was previously established that Dick became Robin in Year Three for a minute; this means all of Batman's pre-Dick adventures took place in an insanely short time period (less than a year). So he brought a kid into his world before he could've known he was being successful or even safe, which makes the whole "kid sidekick" seem even more insane. Don't even think about how Dick aged five years or so in that time or your head will explode.

Jason could not have been Robin for even a full year, given the timeline now. Despite growing up with Batman and Robin, Tim Drake would've become Robin in Year Three or Year Four.

Don't even try to figure out how Damian Wayne exists. Kid can't even be in fucking kindergarten yet.

[Rollo Tomassi]

One drawback of not reading this trash is that I'm sure I'd be finding about 100 of these continuity fuck-ups a week. My stance is that if the guys in charge of DC can't be bothered to give a fuck, why should I?

[anarky]

Greek Street Vol. 2. Don't know much about it, and it wasn't in a condition I'd normally buy, but it was $1.

So three (fairly) local Borders stores were closing within three days, according to their website. First was on Saturday, and we were driving by it to get to Disneyland anyway. So we stopped in, and they had a pretty decent chunk of stuff left, with all books being $1 and everything else 90% off. Not too shabby. We got some stuff.

Second day, one in Palm Springs is closing. There's also the grand opening of the new TRU. It's a bit further, but I figure the deals at the first were awesome. The TRU opening sucks ass; the store is tiny, it's stocked with 2-year-old shit despite being brand new, they've moved it about 20 minutes further than it was, and the service is so insanely slow I actually give up waiting and put my stuff back. So onto Borders... who has four books (three are torn and one's a sticker book without the stickers) and a rack of Bristol Palin autobiographies on CD. Why did they bother opening? I don't know. Interestingly, and this is what annoys me, there are boxes stacked up in a roped-off area, addressed to a home warehouse. In front of these boxes (but inaccessible to the general public) are racks with high-demand books from this year. Nothing I want, but they obviously set those aside at some point when the discount got too low, and the employees don't give a shit now if anyone sees them. It does make them liars with the "nothing held back! everything on sale!" banners.

Third day, I see the website says the one in Rancho Cucamonga is closing. So I drive out there. And find it already closed a few days ago. Gee, thanks. I know you're going under and have no reason to keep your website current, except you're trying to do so for whatever reason, so fuck you for making me waste the gas.

[Rollo Tomassi]

I couldn't get into GreekStreet. I read the first ten issues or so and it never lit my fire.

[anarky]

I found out on Wikipedia the last five issues were never collected. That kinda sucks. They probably never will be. (The Storm Shadow series from Devil's Due was not fully collected, either, but at least there's a large chance IDW will get around to it in the next few years.)

Still, for a buck, it's tough to beat.

[anarky]

Cobra 4. Major Bludd begins his bid towards the top spot. And Cobra double agent Steeler kills Breaker. WTF?!?

Ever have something just sort of brew in the back of your mind, then, suddenly, it clicks and you find yourself saying, "What the fuck?" days later when doing something totally unrelated?

Forget the particulars of how awesome Steeler is and how it sucks that Breaker now bites it in both series. How the fuck does Cobra have an inside man in the Joes? Both teams are so fucking secretive in this new continuity that they just found out the other exists within the past two years, max, in-universe time. The Joes go so far with the secrecy that all official Joes are forced to fake their deaths and completely sever all ties with their family, friends, and everyone else who knew them... and every single one of them was hand-picked by Hawk himself! They don't even use real names when speaking to one another.

How did Cobra sneak an agent into an organization that had existed long before they became aware of them, and get past the one guy who picks the best of the best of the best?

[Diabolical]

Batman & Robin #1 - Doesn't feel like part of "The New 52." Feel like the just replaced Dick with Bruce. Crime Alley is about to be bulldozed and Bruce decides to stop commemorating his parent's murder, while Damien is still a brat and Bruce tries to teach him some respect. Otherwise, like last week's Bat-titles, it was fairly bland.

Criminal: The Last of the Innocent #4 - Final part of the latest arc. Good shit as always.

Daredevil #3 - DD battles something resembling Klaw.

Punisher Max #17 - The aftermath of the "Frank" arc. Introduces Elektra and The Hand into Max. How many DD characters does Aaron intend on using?
Worst Punisher cover ever. Laughably bad. A homeless looking Frank begging for ammunition with"Will punish for ammo" written on the skull.

[Rollo Tomassi]

12 books, plus 2 more out of the dollar bin. 4 of them FI tie-ins.

Amazing Spidey 669. Spider-Island continues! And the big bad villain is revealed!!! It's...uhh...its some woman..with a..spider on her costume. She calls herself the Queen. (They seem to think we should know who she is, but I honestly don't have the foggiest. And I thought I was pretty well versed on Spidey villains. A little help here from the resident Spidey guru, vyn?)

Spider Island: Spider-Girl 2. Anya and Kingpin team up to fight bad guys with their new spider powers.

New Avengers 16. After 47 years, Daredevil joins the Avengers. A FI tie-in.

Secret Avengers 15. FI tie-in from the dollar bin. Didn't read it yet.

Batman:Dark Knight 4. From the dollar bin. Only missing the final issue 5. It was fairly horrible. Especially Commisioner Gordon.

Daredevil 3. DD fights an echo of Klaw.

Ghost Rider 3. It looks as if the new female Ghost Rider takes her job of burning sin from sinners a bit too seriously and wants to kill EVERYBODY (because we are all sinners on some level). So Johnny will probably be GR again after this arc is over. Oh, also a FI tie-in. Oh, and also also I miss Danny Ketch.

GIJoe ARAH 170. We get the history of the Russian branch of the Arishikage Clan, with over 100 franchises.

Cobra 5. Bludd and Tomax (or Xamot, whichever ones still alive) do their machinations and such. Hawk tasks Chameleon (former Cobra agent and current Joe prisoner) with finding out who the mole is (It's Steeler, but Hawk don't know that) because she needs to prove herself. Good stuff.

Iron Man 2.0 8. After being sidetracked with FI, we're back on the whole "Palmer Addley mystery" story. Palmer snuck his brain out of his dead body through his transplanted kidney. Thats so crazy it just might work!!! But for serious, I know that sounds dumbass as all get out, but this is a whipsmart book by Nick Spencer.

PunisherMAX 17. Ermm..a bunch of people who look exacly alike thanks to Steve Dillon's art stare at each other. Some of them have skulls on their chests. Most of them don't.

The Stand: The Night Has Come 2. The epic King story draws closer to its finale. Harold Lauder puts a bullet in his mouth.

Journey Into Mystery 627. Mephisto chats with a bartender. Entertaining issue. JiM is easily Top Five coming from Marvel right now. If you aren't getting it, definitely put it on your Trade hunting list at least.

X-Men Legacy 255. In the middle of a civil war between the Shi'Ar and some of their colonies, Lorna Dane faces off with her father (who you may know better as a certain "Master of Magnetism").

[Diabolical]

Bionic Man #2 - Not so sure this needed to be as big a mini-series as Green Hornet, as issue two plods along. Two issues in and Steve Austin isn't bionic yet.

Butcher #3 - Origin of The Boys leader continues without the usual over-the-top shenanigans Ennis is known for.

Daredevil #4 - Matt helps a blind guy.

A Game of Thrones #1 - Nice adaptation so far, covering about the first 40 pages of the 800 page book, which would take about 20 issues to make just book 1. Minor gripe, but some of the characters look the same (like Theon and Jon).

Marvel Universe vs. Wolverine #4 - Cap, Frank, Deadpool help Wolverine hold of Hulk's army of monsters while the uninfected get to safety. Things don't go so well for some of them.

Batman #1 SPOILERS - Batman and "Joker" (Dick in disguise) beat the shit out of some Arkham inmates that get out of their cells. Later, Bruce unveils his plan to help save Gotham to the public. Dick, Tim and Damien are all there, but somehow they look to be 16, 12 and 9 years old. Later, Batman shows up at a murder scene Bullock is investigating. On the wall there is a message saying "Bruce Wayne will die tomorrow" and the DNA under the dead man's fingernails matches...(dramatic pause)...Dick Grayson.
Far better than the other Batman titles so far. I'll probably pick up issue #2. I've always liked Greg Capullo's art when he isn't trying to be Todd McFarlane, which he still does from time to time here, but it is still good overall.

Catwoman #1 SPOILERS - Some guys in skull masks break into Selina's apartment and start shooting. She dives out the window, half-dressed with a pet carrier full of cats in hand, right before the whole apartment goes Ka-boom. She goes to her friend (and fence) for help, who sets her up in a place for a few weeks, and gives Selina a tip on a job. In disguise as a bartender at a club full of Russians she spots a man who is supposed to be in prison (her father?), so she follows him into the bathroom and beats the shit out of him, then escapes the bar. Batman shows up at her temporary apartment to find out what happened. Then they fuck.
Another one that was good enough for me to pick up issue #2. Guillem March's art was good. I liked his stuff when he was drawing Gotham City Sirens.

[vynsane]

i'm so far behind, but i actually bought comics yesterday! i picked up the All-New Ultimate Spider-man, Atomic Robo: The Ghost of Station X #1 and Invincible #82. only got to read USM so far, i'm going to post my thoughts in a new topic.

[Rollo Tomassi]

16 books this week. Only three FI tie-ins.

Spider-Island: Cloak & Dagger 2. Dagger fights Mr. Negative for the life of Cloak.

Spider-Island: Spider-Woman oneshot. Spider-Woman has to save Alicia Masters from Gypsy Moth because in an obscure Marvel 2in1 issue from the 70s Alicia was given Spider Powers and therefore (according to Reed's EXTREMLY tenuous chain of thought logiv) she is the cure to the Spider Infestation.

Avengers 17. FI tie-in. Marvel Boy(or whatever he's calling himself these days..Protector?) jury rigs all of Tony Stark's old Iron Man armors to come alive and protect the Avengers. These are the same armors that Tony has repeatedly reduced to scrap in other comics so that they wouldnt fall into enemy hands. I've read that story at least three different times. And yet, when somebody needs an Iron Man army BOOP there they all are again.

Young Avengers 7. The X-Men and Avengers fight over who gets to put Scarlet Witch on trial so they can exacute her. Logan shows his true colors by siding with the Avengers. Douche. I'd kick that runty little asshole off the X-Men if I were Scott.

Captain America 3. Cap fights the Ameridroid, which is an 18 ft tall version of himself.

Daredevil 4. heh. Diabolical's summary above is about it. But Latveria is involved, so were likely to see a Daredevil/Dr. Doom fight and/or team up in the next few issues.

Game of Thrones 1. The same as Diabolical's review.

Heroes For Hire 12. Final Issue...maybe? I dropped this for the FI stuff, and I think this book is getting cancelled/revamped as a Villains for Hire book.

Iron Man 508. FI tie-in. Tony is still in Asgard uru-weaponizing his Armor. Pepper is still in Paris getting beat up by a super powered Grey Gargoyle.

Marvel Index 2. Wacky hijinks from the Punisher, Wolverine, and Ghost Rider.

Thor Goes Hollywood oneshot. Bought this to round up to 16 books. Its all the variant Thor covers from earlier this year collected into a oneshot with commentary from each artist on their choice of which Hollywood Movie poster they 'homaged'. Interesting, but I'm not sure I would've spent the $4 on it knowing what it was.

Thunderbolts 163.1 Point One issue. Reflective issue focusing on Songbird whose been with the TBolts since day one. it does its point one job of summarizing the series, but not very excitingly. Also, the TBolts figured out their ex-teammates who escaped are in the past.

Vengeance 3. So this went from an 8 issue series at $2.99 each to a six issue at $3.99 each. haven't even read it yet, but the pricing switcheroo kinda sticks in my craw.

X-Factor 225. Rahne is upset and broody about her baby being all evil and whatnot. Madrox begins investigating a murder mystery.

Uncanny X-Men 543. Colossus as the new Juggernaut fights with Cain who is now a FI baddie with a hammer. Lots of property damage ensues. Next issue is the final issue. *sniffle*

X-Men Schism 4. As a giant Sentinel bears down on Utopia, Scott and Logan find this is the best time to get into a fight. Dramatic? Yes. Stupid? Very Yes. And its not that I don't think either side's argument is better than the other ( I personally take Scott's side of staying and fighting, rather than running and hiding) but I don't think either side's argument is strong enough to get into a fist fight over. And I don't think Scott OR Logan are acting in character.

[anarky]

I used an Amazon Gold Box deal yesterday to order another volume of Walking Dead (11, IIRC). I'm slowly filling it in.

Also, I picked up the paperback of Poe yesterday. I was at Anarky Jr's book fair, so a portion of the profits go toward filling in their library, and they're a new school. They had "graphic novels" but the selection was limited; as far as stuff I was interested in, it was that. A couple of Clone Wars comics and a Thor movie adaptation, as well as something that looked like it was one of those "all-ages" retellings of classic stories (in this case Secret Wars), because we all know there was way too much fucking and swearing in those 80s books. Anywho, it looked fairly intriguing, and I seemed to recall reading some positive reviews when it came out in floppies.

Given that the book fairs are run by Scholastic, I was REALLY shocked to not see any volumes of Bone in color, which is one of the extremely few comics I'm willing to double-dip on (but haven't yet). I pointed this out to Mrs. A, who mentioned they had to be careful with what they carry. "So Bone is more offensive than this stack of bullpoop [I was at a school with kids around, remember?] vampire romance novels?"

They also had Squish: Super Amoeba #1. Anarky Jr thought she'd gotten that one at Comic-Con, but I didn't think so. I quick perusal of our hauls proved she had not. I might let her pick it up today if she wants it.

[jjreason]

Uncanny X-Men 543 (FI)
Secret Avengers 17 (Warren Ellis, not sure if this is his first issue on here or not but that's not usually bad news)
Schism 4
New Avengers 16.1
New Avengers 16 (FI)
FF9
DD3
Cap 3
Avengers 17 (FI)
ASM 669,670

Superman 1 out of respect for George Perez
Action 1 out of lack of respect for myself. Oh, and it's even a reprint.

[anarky]

God I FUCKING HATE not having a comic shop nearby. And the closest one being one of the worst I've ever been to. Even the goddamned store in Pennsylvania that was in a church basement for some odd-ass reason (no joke) and smelled as if it flooded weekly was better than this hole.

Was in town this morning, so I stopped in to pick up a few of the DC Retro-Actives (since they may or may not ever get reprinted). I needed Batman 90s; wanted Batman 80s, Superman 90s, Justice League 90s, Green Lantern 70s, and Green Lantern 80s; and might have gotten Wonder Woman 70s and the other Superman and Batman titles.

Go into their new location about an hour ago (carrying a baby, BTW, but wearing a Batman shirt--I'm clearly a geek no matter how civilized I might look). One customer paying for stuff. One hobo-looking employee at the register being friendly to him. Customer finishes and leaves as I'm coming across the threshold of the store. The employee looks at me, then turns around, not doing anything, just giving me his back. It's clear I don't quite understand their bizarre setup (and I'm pretty quick on the uptake when it comes to comic shop layouts, unless they're really fucked up), but this dude is clearly intent on not even giving me a "hello."

No Retro-Actives on the racks with new stuff (despite having "new" titles going back to January). All of this week's DC 52 titles are polybagged and priced at $9.99 and up. That was my issue with these fuckers before; when they think shit will be hot, they either hold it for a few weeks and put it out at an inflated price, or just skip that step and put it out at an inflated price on day 1. THESE FUCKING BOOKS STREETED YESTERDAY, THEY DON'T PUT NEW STUFF OUT HERE UNTIL THURSDAYS, AND THE COCKMONKEYS ARE CHARGING MORE THAN THREE TIMES COVER PRICE!! I go to their back issues, which are, no shit,in a fucking dresser, complete with drawers. A couple of times I glance in the direction of the employee, who I once catch looking at me for whatever reason and immediately turning his back again when my head points toward him. Still, if they've got the shit I want, I'll get it. So I look under each individual title, as well as D for DC Retro-Active and R for Retro-Active. Nothing. Given their lack of ordering skills, I have to think they either didn't order any of them at all, or only ordered them for subscribers. It's not been so long that they should be completely out of every fucking one (I even looked for ones I wasn't wanting).

As I leave, I say to the employee, "It sucks that the store across town had to close down and you stayed open."